Monday, April 30, 2012

Thinking Simplicity

Kelvin said to me a little while ago, "I know you can live in whatever conditions. You don't need much. You are quite simple." This came up as we were talking about life and where to go and how to live and general dreaming type stuff. 

I took it as a compliment. I do think I am quite simple in my living. 

Yesterday, we skipped church..again..and stayed home to have a wonderful day at home. On Sundays, Oprah comes on at 1:30pm. We usually miss it because of church. But we got the chance to watch it. I am not the biggest fan but I tend to gravitate towards any TV show that is not a spanish soap opera, a nigerian movie, or swahili news. 

The show was on living simply and profiled the lives a few american families who just collected so much 'stuff'. One mom lived in a mansion with her two sons and gave them everything they wanted. She also had a closet full of $400 shoes that she had never worn. The other family was a mom who just bargain hunted like a monster. Any bargain she would find, she would stock up on. I mean, bargain hunting is great, but this lady had 100 boxes of cereal...a little overboard. (Actually, Kenya never has bargains or sales in the supermarkets. I miss that. The prices do go up and down a lot though depending on the supply. Currently milk has sky-rocketed in price while ugali has gone down. I miss sales, bargains, 2 for 1 deals.) 

The show made me a little sick considering where I live. Kenyans live very simple cause they don't have the means to be extravagant. But then I had to remember that I do come from the land of excess and too much. I can be guilty too. 

In both of these families, when they cut out all their 'stuff' and started to live a little more simply they found that their families grew tighter. They ate their meals together and played games in the evenings. THey walked to school together and became more creative. It was a healthy change for their families. 

It inspired me to take a look at my life and see how I am clogging up my time with things that are not building me or my family up. 

The biggest thing for me (us, Kelvin too) is technology or our phones. We both have phones that have internet so we are constantly browsing. Sometimes it is the first thing I do when I wake up. What would it look like if we turned off our phones for a little while and just focused on something else like each other? 

Just before we left for vacation, my iPod and our iPhone both died. I was pretty bummed. I mean 13 hours on bus with no music? That's no fun. Then I also forgot my camera and was pretty upset about that too. But I did indeed manage. I had to entertain myself on the bus which resulted in more talking with my husband. Not having my camera allowed me to be fully present in the moment rather than constantly figuring out how to capture the moment well so I can post it in my blog. 

Once we reached Kelvin's mom's place, my simple lifestyle was challenged. I just finished a yummy chocolate bar and asked Kelvin where the garbage bin is for the wrapper. "She doesn't have one." What? Who doesn't have a garbage can? She doesn't have one cause she doesn't need one. She lives with so little waste. I was so embarrassed over the next couple days with my 'simple' life. I went to bath with a sponge, shower gel, and conditioner (not even shampoo people). Everyone else went to bath with a bar of soap. I had a gigantic suitcase just for me while his sister showed up with a backpack with clothes for 2 weeks. I had my handy flash light, travel pillow, and fluffy socks for night time where everyone else slept in their clothes with no pillow and no light to see at night. I looked like a princess. 

I am not poo-pooeing stuff. I like stuff. I like my technology but when it is getting in the way of building relationships or fully enjoying the moment, I think it needs to put away. Everything in moderation right? 

Right after we watched the show, we decided to turn off the tv and go for a walk at the beach. I only put 200shillings ($2.50) in my pocket and our keys and we headed out the door.  We spent $1 on transport and 50cents on two bags of cassava chips. We had a great 2 hour walk on the beach with no distractions. A perfect outing with my hubby. 

As of now, the tv is off, the cat is purring on my lap and I am drinking a sweet cup of black, lemongrass tea. The simple life...

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Sleep, mud, chai, car-sick Kenyans, peace, and family.

That pretty much sums up our vacation.

Sleep- We crashed. Upon arriving in Ilula, we passed right out. Each day we had naps in the morning and afternoon. We had the best night sleeps in the cold, quiet environment. Once we got to Nairobi, we spent the mornings just hanging out in bed sleeping, reading, and having breakfast in bed. Our bodies obviously needed all the rest. 


Mud- The rains have definitely hit Kenya (except Mombasa for some reason). The whole country seems to be flooding. Most of our trip was spent in the village where there is no paved roads, just dirt. And what happens when dirt and water mix? MUD and lots of it. We were covered in it. We had to take motorcycles to the village where Kelvin's mom lives. It was raining which caused our motorcycles to slide back and forth like a car on ice in the winter. I enjoyed the rain thoroughly but could have lived without the mud. The rain was so harsh that it caused huge flooding all across the country (people have died because of it). The night before we left Nairobi for home, a bridge had flooded so no cars could pass making all the buses to be late. Because of it we got nice fancy bus for the ride home since ours hadn't arrived. However, on our way out we hit major traffic as the road had flooded. The water was at least 2-3 feet deep. Thankfully, our bus was high enough to drive right through it. 


Chai- We probably drank 50 cups of chai each in the 10 days we were gone. With the cold weather, it was the perfect thing to warm us up while we visited with our loved ones. We ate some pretty wonderful food along the way too. I devoured every piece of chicken that came my way. 


Car-sick Kenyans- We took a lot of buses. We covered a lot of miles. And I have never seen so many people get car-sick. I can't stand the sound of people vomiting so it was uncomfortable for me. I felt like walking around the bus and handing everyone some of my gravol. We realized that it was mostly people from the village who were getting sick. We also realized that these people would eat huge meals while travelling. Not smart people, not smart. 


Peace- I think our theme for this trip was 'peace'. Before leaving, I started praying to become a woman of peace. Like deep, soul peace in all circumstances. That is what I have been craving the last few months. I am slowly learning how to step into the peace God has made available to me. During our time in Ilula, I had a man say to me, "I just feel an incredible sense of peace about you." I thought that was pretty powerful considering we had only met a couple days before. Kelvin also shared with me during the end of the trip that he is feeling more at peace now as well and that was something God was showing him during this trip. God has been good to us. 


Family- We were so warmly welcomed in Ilula,  Kelvin especially. The people there have been my family in Kenya for the past 6 and a half years and now they have opened their arms to Kelvin as well. They made it very clear that he was indeed their 'son'. The children adored him and adopted him as their new big brother. Then once we got to Kelvin's mom's place, we were privileged to spend some sweet time with his twin sisters who were on holiday from school. Then his other sister and niece showed up which made for a house full of girls. I am pretty blessed to have so many sisters.  


It was a wonderful trip. We are now back in Mombasa feeling refreshed and rejuvenated, ready to continue to do what God has asked us to. We are making some changes in our schedules to focus on what we believe is important. Our boys seem to be in some sort of crisis right now. We just released the coach as we think he was a big part of the problem. And they are at each other's throats like little girls so we have some major damage control to attend to. We are having a big meeting on Monday with all of them to sort it out. It's hurts when your 'kids' aren't happy.  Such is life.

Unfortunately, I forgot my camera at home and was unable to capture the many awesome moments of this trip.

Thanking Jesus for how good He is to us!

Sleep, mud, chai, car-sick Kenyans, peace, and family.

That pretty much sums up our vacation.

Sleep- We crashed. Upon arriving in Ilula, we passed right out. Each day we had naps in the morning and afternoon. We had the best night sleeps in the cold, quiet environment. Once we got to Nairobi, we spent the mornings just hanging out in bed sleeping, reading, and having breakfast in bed. Our bodies obviously needed all the rest. 


Mud- The rains have definitely hit Kenya (except Mombasa for some reason). The whole country seems to be flooding. Most of our trip was spent in the village where there is no paved roads, just dirt. And what happens when dirt and water mix? MUD and lots of it. We were covered in it. We had to take motorcycles to the village where Kelvin's mom lives. It was raining which caused our motorcycles to slide back and forth like a car on ice in the winter. I enjoyed the rain thoroughly but could have lived without the mud. The rain was so harsh that it caused huge flooding all across the country (people have died because of it). The night before we left Nairobi for home, a bridge had flooded so no cars could pass making all the buses to be late. Because of it we got nice fancy bus for the ride home since ours hadn't arrived. However, on our way out we hit major traffic as the road had flooded. The water was at least 2-3 feet deep. Thankfully, our bus was high enough to drive right through it. 


Chai- We probably drank 50 cups of chai each in the 10 days we were gone. With the cold weather, it was the perfect thing to warm us up while we visited with our loved ones. We ate some pretty wonderful food along the way too. I devoured every piece of chicken that came my way. 


Car-sick Kenyans- We took a lot of buses. We covered a lot of miles. And I have never seen so many people get car-sick. I can't stand the sound of people vomiting so it was uncomfortable for me. I felt like walking around the bus and handing everyone some of my gravol. We realized that it was mostly people from the village who were getting sick. We also realized that these people would eat huge meals while travelling. Not smart people, not smart. 


Peace- I think our theme for this trip was 'peace'. Before leaving, I started praying to become a woman of peace. Like deep, soul peace in all circumstances. That is what I have been craving the last few months. I am slowly learning how to step into the peace God has made available to me. During our time in Ilula, I had a man say to me, "I just feel an incredible sense of peace about you." I thought that was pretty powerful considering we had only met a couple days before. Kelvin also shared with me during the end of the trip that he is feeling more at peace now as well and that was something God was showing him during this trip. God has been good to us. 


Family- We were so warmly welcomed in Ilula,  Kelvin especially. The people there have been my family in Kenya for the past 6 and a half years and now they have opened their arms to Kelvin as well. They made it very clear that he was indeed their 'son'. The children adored him and adopted him as their new big brother. Then once we got to Kelvin's mom's place, we were privileged to spend some sweet time with his twin sisters who were on holiday from school. Then his other sister and niece showed up which made for a house full of girls. I am pretty blessed to have so many sisters.  


It was a wonderful trip. We are now back in Mombasa feeling refreshed and rejuvenated, ready to continue to do what God has asked us to. We are making some changes in our schedules to focus on what we believe is important. Our boys seem to be in some sort of crisis right now. We just released the coach as we think he was a big part of the problem. And they are at each other's throats like little girls so we have some major damage control to attend to. We are having a big meeting on Monday with all of them to sort it out. It's hurts when your 'kids' aren't happy.  Such is life.

Unfortunately, I forgot my camera at home and was unable to capture the many awesome moments of this trip.

Thanking Jesus for how good He is to us!

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Jumpin' up and down and flailin' all around

I skipped church this morning.

Forgive me.

I chose to stay home and prepare the house before we travel tomorrow. I forgot how much you have to do just so you can leave and come back to a clean, sane, in order house. I admire my mother as I now realize all she had to do to get us ready to leave. I get her now. That's happening more these days: getting my mother.

I chose to stay home from church to clean (gasp! my parents are probably so confused. What happened to their lazy, princess daughter who never liked to clean anything?). I guess that shows you just about how excited I am about church these days.

Recently, I have been coming home from church more drained, tired and cranky than I should be. I think its a combination of the heat, the dreadful metal roof we sit under, and the 3+ hours of church we 'do'. It's not been my favourite day of the week.

So I played hookie today. And I am so glad I did.

The hubby went though. Thats was ok. The minute he stepped out the door, I turned to my iTunes. The first song I played was "I am a friend of God." Within seconds I could feel my spirit lifting. I felt so light. I started moving my hips, then bouncing a little, then, just as the chorus hit, I broke out into full jumping and flailing my arms in the air. It. felt. so. good.

Do you ever have those moments? I thank my mother, again, who always created an atmosphere of spontaneous dance sessions in our house. I didn't want to stop today. I just couldn't wipe the smile off my face, I couldn't stop jumping (even though everything in my body was telling my to), and I felt so FULL. It's that in moment where God reminded me of how awesome He is, He touched me with his Spirit, He came close and reminded me that I, indeed, am His friend.

I needed that.

We are SO ready to get out of this city tomorrow. I am actually looking forward to the 15 hour bus ride ahead of us just cause I want to get away. Kelvin and I crashed yesterday - tired and weary of everything. We need this break.

We are heading to my favourite place on earth:Ilula! I am going to introduce my husband to all the kids. Today, I found a note one of them wrote me last time I was there which read, "You are now growing up & getting married. I hope you will come visit when you are two." I am coming my sweet kids!! We will have a small wedding celebration with them with cake and rejoicing. I just printed off some photos and put them in an album for them to all see. I just can't wait for all the hugs!!!

After that we will head to Kisumu for 2 days just to hang out together. We are going to ride on the back of bicycles and eat fresh tilapia beside Lake Victoria.

Then we will go to Kelvin's mom's place for a few days. Kelvin has told me he wants to dig a borehole when there.....um....fun? I might just watch. It will be a nice couple days of village life, eating fresh food, connecting with family, and fireflies!!!

Seeing how our pockets are holding up, we will decided what to do after that. We might hit Nairobi for a couple days or maybe explore some other little town in Kenya. We don't know. But that's the fun of it all.

I won't be blogging for the next couple weeks. Hopefully you will get a more 'refreshed' Nikole when I return.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

A ladies day out

The girls had been asking me for a while, "When are we going swimming?" I think they are just desperate to get out of Kongowea. They probably don't get out a lot. I figured that it was about time I treated them to a day out. 

We went to a local resort and had an absolute blast. We laughed watching each other attempting to swim. We played games. We chatted. We relaxed. We talked. We did girl stuff. 

They all stuck to the wall. They aren't the best of swimmers but ventured into the deep end by holding on to the wall.

Tina had a bit of a scary incident when she got herself a little too deep and couldn't get her head above water. I had to go get her. She was fine. We all laughed. 

We arranged for a conference room and hung out there for a few hours in the afternoon. Go figure that the ONE day that it decides to get rainy and blustery, we go to the pool. I had been praying for rain and some cool weather but not on the day where we were going swimming. It was so nice to have a 'warm' room to hang out in while it poured outside. Rahab came to join us for the day and made us play some silly games. 
 I didn't just want this day to be about fun. I wanted the girls to also learn a bit. I brought in my dear friend Maria to come and talk to the girls. I have been really encouraging the girls to discover their gifts, talents, strengths, and the things they love doing. I want them to be able to use the things that they love to do most and that they are best to make a living for themselves. I find that so many people in Kenya find jobs just for the money yet are so unsatisfied with their lives. I want these ladies to LOVE what they do. And they are at the point in their lives where they can choose what they want to do in life. SO Maria really encouraged them in this direction more. Maria just quit her job as a high end marketing director for a local company that produces palm oil products. She quit her job because it was draining her. Although she was making good money and she was good at what she was doing, she was so unfulfilled. She has decided to pursue  her passion in graphic design and is in the beginning stages of starting her own company. I wanted her to be an inspiration to the girls to follow their passions when it comes to career. Not just go where the money is. 


Maria made every girl come up, write their names vertically, and then write an adjective describing themselves beside each letter of their names. It was a great exercise for the ladies to discover themselves and then to be proud of who they are!

This was by-far my favourite one. Especially the first two. The great part is that it pretty much describes this girl to the tee. Hilarious. 

 At the end of the day we headed to  beach for a stroll. It was easter so the beach was buzzing with activity. 

I came home smiling after a great day with these sweet girls. 

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

The first meeting

I remember seeing a dark shadow walking down the dark hallway. My first thought was that he was short and walked with a kink. Rahab (my beloved friend) had just introduced herself to me and welcomed me to Word of Life. Cheery and welcoming as she always is, she offered to take me around and introduce me to people. She was closing the kitchen door when the dark shadow appeared into the light.

"This is Kevin. Or o-pie-o!" she introduced (yes, Rahab was actually the one who introduced us). They all laughed. I didn't get it.

We all sat on some rocks right near the kitchen and told stories. They made the effort to speak in english but I still didn't say much. They replayed the funny parts on their favourite tv show and burst into laughter. I didn't think it was funny. I remember wondering why Kelvin was laughing so much...it wasn't funny. I didn't think much of him. Nice to meet him. That's it.

A half hour later he invited me to watch the tv show they were all talking about. He practically peed himself in the corner while I still struggled to understand why it was funny. It was nice he was making the effort to make me feel welcome.

I forget the rest of the night but it was the start of the most confusing yet wonderful 3 weeks of my life.

I was going through a confusing time in my life and just wanted to hear from God. I just wanted to reconnect with Him. I was so hungry for some direction from my heavenly Father. But over the next week, I developed the strangest attraction to Kevin or Calvin (took me a while to figure out it was Kelvin). I prayed, repented, and begged God to get my focus away from him. I felt like I was in eight grade again and got butterflies every time my crush passed by my locker.

A week and a half later, we found ourselves in the office chatting after a long day of camp. By the morning, we had literally decided to get married.

Yes, we decided to. We had feelings for each other but it was more of an intellectual decision.

When I look back, it was truly crazy. But I am so thankful for that conversation. Because honestly, I think I would have let Kelvin slip away if I hadn't made a crazy commitment of marriage to a man I barely knew.

I had doubts. We both did. But we both drew near to God and He kept urging us to have faith in the way He directs our steps.

That was 3 years ago this week. March 31st was the day we met. April 7th was the day he took me for an innocent scoop of ice cream. April 10th was the day we decided we would get married.

I remember being so uncertain.

But am I ever glad I had an ounce of faith in me. Cause just look at us now.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Visions and Goals

A couple Saturdays ago, my topic with the girls was "Visions and Goals". As I have talked with Kenyans, I have learned that while they were growing up, they weren't encouraged to think about their futures or to make any goals for their lives. A friend of mine told me, "From the age of seven, my mom was teaching me to be a wife. That was it. We were never told to think of anything else for our lives." I started to wonder if this was the same for my own girls.

I had a little discussion with them about what it means to have a vision for your life, to set goals, and then to plan the steps in how you can achieve your goals. I had made a little sheet that I asked them to fill out and then bring back to me the next week. On the sheet, they were to write 3 goals they want to accomplish by the end of the year and how they plan to meet those goals. They were to write 3 goals for their life time and how to accomplish them. They wrote of the various things that would hinder them from achieving these goals and then they wrote a general vision they had for their lives.

I got back the sheets this week and finally read them today. I was smiling ear to ear hearing the hearts of these sweet sweet girls. I sat and prayerfully looked through them asking that God would help them to accomplish all their dreams. I know their are some that I can help. For instance, one girl wants to write and produce a song by the end of this year. I just happen to have a really good friend who is a famous gospel artist and just finished recording her album. I am going to see if I could hook them up.

So here were some of their goals:
- to write a song
- to be a good mother
- to be God-fear
- to help my parents
- to achieve (certain) grades in school this year
- to finish computer classes
- to have good morals
- to help the orphans and the needy in the community
- to obey my elders
- to be an accountant/secretary/business lady/journalist
- to preach peace all over the world
- to start a netball association
- to unite our family
- to fight poverty amongst their beloved community
- to have my own tv show
- to remain faithful in terms of a relationship (not fooling around with boys)
- to care for the environment (this is so un-kenyan)

Quite a few of them put "having fun" as one of their goals. I think that is such a great goal! Then they talked about the ways they were going to make sure they have fun ie. go to the beach, hang out with friends, play games,etc. Go have fun girls! 

I was surprised how selfless many of their goals were. Most of them wanted to help their families. Many of them wanted to help out their community (especially orphans - we have a couple girls who are actually orphans). All of them want to walk with God. Alot of them wanted to preach peace in the world. Their hearts are beautiful!!

The biggest challenge for them is finances. That is no surprise.

At the bottom of the page, I wrote in quotes:

"*Remember: God has a purpose for all our lives. He created you to do great things. If He puts a goal or vision on your heart, He also provides a way to accomplish it. Nothing is impossible without Him but you must have faith"


Sometimes I just think of all the goals or visions God has put on my heart over the years and of how they have come true. I mean the Rehma Ladies was a vision I had and look at us now! Our God is so amazing.


Pray for these ladies. I really want to help all of them but in my own capacity, I can't. I am trying to think of ways that we, as a group, can make some money. I have a few ideas so far but will let you know when they transpire. 

Tumechoka

Tumechoka. We. are. tired. 



Just after taking this photo, Kelvin says to me, 
"Baby, you need to wipe all the sweat off your head. Your face is shiny." 

People, we are tired. Really tired. 

What do I mean by that? We are tired of just life. Kelvin and I both feel exhausted with everything - work, the boys, the ladies, the HEAT, mombasa, our church, the food, finances, and well, everything. 

This morning, Kelvin woke up with a sore throat and a stuffed nose. The fan is giving him so many troubles at night. The tough part is that the fan is so necessary. I woke up the second the power went out last night and immediately started sweating. In the mornings, I find that I wake up more tired and dehydrated than before I went to bed. Yes, the heat has been horrible. I mean horrible. (Canadians, don't even begin to complain about the snow and rain. At least you have the option of a warm house. We don't have cool air. Ever.)

Yesterday, I had a rough morning before heading to church (I believe it was the devil scheming). I was in tears as I was sweating, trying to muster up any energy, battling a heat headache, not able to find the right clothes to wear, struggling with my bra (yes, my bra), and general weariness. I am so glad I pushed through and went to church. Church was SO refreshing for both Kelvin and I. We really needed it. On the way home though, I was drained. I was so hot, still had my headache, tired, emotional, and tired. I got home and passed out on the couch. We didn't eat lunch till 4. 

We love our work, but we are a little tired of it. We love our house, but we are tired. Mombasa is great, but I am tired of it. I remember other missionaries telling me that after every 3 months, they start to get weary and tired and must get a away even if it is only for a couple days. That is where we are at. 

Every morning, as we are eating breakfast, we do a lent devotional which is preparing our hearts for Easter. As we are walking along with Jesus, as he walks in his final hours, we are amazed at His strength. Particularly, his weakest moment in Gethsemane has really struck us. The moment where He feels He can go on no longer and asks for this cup to be removed from Him. At that moment, He must have mustered up some supernatural strength from His Father above to say, "Yet not my will be done, but yours." He knows what is going to happen. He knows the cup won't be taken away from Him. But He draws strength from The Father to do what He is suppose to. 

Kelvin and I are tired. But in our weak moments, we have decided to draw our strength from God trusting that He will indeed grant us the rest we need and renew our energy.